I’ve been using the phrase “power exchange orientation” for some time. Mostly because I think it enables discussion of D/s without carrying along much of the old baggage that often seems to bring along old lore without adding much clarity.
Maymay has written an essay:
Being submissive is who I am sexually. I can not imagine being any other way. Furthermore, I have always been submissive sexually. The very first sexualized memory I have is one of a fantasy that involves orgasm control, and ever since then and probably from well before, control and power have been inexorably linked to my expressions of sexual fulfillment. In other words, for me sexual arousal is tied to feeling submissive; I rarely, if ever, feel turned on unless I also feel submissive (in one of myriad ways).
Because Submissive is an Orientation
I have always been submissive to women (girls), even as a young boy. On the other hand I have always been very dominate toward men (boys). I boxed for many years and won the Southern golden gloves, in fact I have never lost a fight. I thought about continued but boxing interferred with college, being a chemistry major I didn’t have time for keeping in shape that was required.